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The Black Intoxication (studio)

from Durga On The Wing Of Abomination by Medroxy Progesterone Acetate

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I feel these things slip away from me. It's all dream-language, up above the clouds, so slow the words move in geographic time, glacier-motion. Liquids and potions, topological maps of everything you ever said to me, searching for salts in the sand. Go up. Body gone light. Pullapart. Drug psychosis. Stumbled into metanoia. I knew your body but you changed your body, I can't find you anymore. If (loose and nothing fits anymore) #void the holes in me. Means of exploring self, perhaps, perhaps. The vertigo that makes everything gray. People we know and their forms. Rereading after meeting. Gasses and liquids and misidentification of the other. Oh I forgot to touch, meanings got away from me now. Who's the you? When you talk to me, I can hear things, and I know you are worried for me, and I really wish you weren't. The soft spaces in your sentences feel too close to the slowing of talking to children. You've made assumptions. I know I am not all right, I even know that I am Fucked Up, but I do know that there is no need for all this worry, which is beginning to scare me, for I know that there's no way I would ever know if I was getting stupider. The decay sets in, perhaps. "How are you? Are you okay? Are you sure?" and I know you're just trying to care, so I can't even get upset, can't even get the runner-up prize of catharsis. And in the end you may be right. You're too much my friend to tell me straight, too kind for words like something is wrong with you, but I know you well enough to decode from your statements and suppositions, deduce from day-to-day chatter. I once decided it would be better to trust your judgment than my own, but in those days I was Well. But it's so hard to tell the difference anymore.

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from Durga On The Wing Of Abomination, released April 25, 2016

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Delexnos Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Delexnos hosts the albums of Medroxy Progesterone Acetate, Clocksucker, Bauler Larson Overdrive, Dirty White Droid, BFP and related bands.

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